i found an old sketch-book that tessa and tangerine and i used to doodle in when i first moved to 523 B 42nd street, Oakland, CA 946somethingnumber.

tessa drew a lot of cups of bubble tea. i hated bubble tea - i hate slimy things, so she drew a lot of them to piss me off. she drew a lot of umbrellas and moustaches and cupcakes with the 152 piece glitter pen set my aunt had bought me at costco.

its weird to look at them now, knowing shes dead and always will be. i could frame them or burn them, but i will probably never do either.

for now, i will google image search some of the prime phrases we doodled in that sketch-book, and post the most pleasing results.

1) "GUINEA PUNX":




2) "veeegan cupcake?":




3) "BUBBLE TEA":





4)"PARALYZING SPIDER BITE";




5) "wolverine":




6) "breffislonchdinnar":




7) "whiskey women":

http://zira.livejournal.com/

that was my friend tessa. she OD'd and now she's dead. no one knows if it was intentional or not.

i loved her. in 2006 she sewed me a bunch of owls. fabric owls. she made a stencil painting for me, too. an owl wearing a bow-tie.

i cut off the friendship when she started to use needles. i told her "if you make this decision, i can no longer have you in me life." guess what she chose.

but i fucking cared about her. i loved her. i did. so i checked up on her from time to time. jesus H, i could have been such a better friend. i chose wrong, too.

she used to always try and get in my pants. we probably made out a few times. she was so cute. used to be a 'suicide girl'. fuck, if the irony of that isnt hilarious, then tell me what is. anyway, i could never bring myself to seal the deal, so to speak. i always told her "easy, cowgirl", because she was like a little sister to me.

i love you, tessa. always have and always will.